“they won’t be doing the whole monogamous marriage thing that’s all the rage with the heteros.”
seriously? shouldn’t the whole “monogamous” thing be all the rage with ANY marriage? and we wonder why people are so adamant to protect the sanctity of marriage … go figure.

@John: Humans are socially monogamous but sexually polygamous. In ANY marriage there’s a good chance of extramarital affairs; it’s just a question of how out in the open these affairs can be.
Think about it for a second. If humans were sexually monogamous, there would be no such thing as a sexually transmitted disease, and we wouldn’t have words for illegitimate children.

Not doing the whole monogamy thing eh? Rather fuck like dogs w/ any dog w/ a big dick and tight stomach that comes along I bet.
And you faggots all wonder why heteros don’t have any respect for queers and gay marriage…oh except in San Fransicko the liberal capitol of promiscuity.
Actually after being “out” for 30+ yrs and seeing/experiencing what I have w/ gays I don’t have respect for them either.
Showing some CLASS never hurt anyone. It might even get people to show some respect toward gays.

I just don’t get it…why get married if you’re not going to stay monogamous? What blows my mind is gay people really wonder why people look down on the gay community and the thought of gay marriage? This is it, folks. Comments like “they won’t be doing the whole monogamous marriage thing that’s all the rage with the heteros” and gay guys getting married but still screwing around with other guys. If I was straight, I would be against gay marriage too. In fact, I am gay and sometimes I myself think that I am against gay marriage.

John, you are speaking of marriage from a “religious” standpoint. The criminal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) that was enacted in the late 90′s was put into place because there was a fear that somehow gays would destroy what straights had perfected. HUH?? With a divorce rate of about 50% in the first 3-5 years, at that point, why ion the world would we even want it? Especially since most gay couples that I know have been together for far longer than either one of my sisters and their one-time husbands. Two close friends married after being together almost 30 years- and then the one died of cancer. I married my partner of 18 years and he died of cancer 9 months later. I was fortunate to fall for another guy and we married in late 2006, but one thing we determined was that we were NOT a heterosexual couple- and OUR marriage was going to work the way WE wanted it to. Most hetero marriages end because of those nasty “irreconcilable differences” that happen when one or the other fools around behind their mate’s back. We simply don’t do that- any play that happens for either of us, and there is a fair amount, is fully in the open and may include both of us. We are approaching our 3rd anniversary and there is no tension or trouble revolving around our “faithfulness”- because we are STILL head over heels in love. Anyone who insists that a partner must be something that he\she is not to prove that he\she loves him\her is asking for a really quick end to any relationship, male or female- or a long miserable unsatisfying one. I am not knocking monogamy, I am simply willing to admit that it isn’t for everyone, and it is NOT the only way to have a successful marriage. Those who think that marriage must be a sacrifice, (try to) be monogamous- and talk to me after you split up- I will likely still be married, and “getting it” a lot more than you were even when you were married.

and oh yes- “sanctity”? another religion-based word that is being applied to a legal joining of two people. Separation of church and state, remember??

Cooper has the right idea- Tyler and Tim have no clue, and ought to find a nice ditzy blond (female) to wear their ring and have their kids…

Hello they’re porn stars…obviously they are not going to be monogamous…jesus you people need to loosen up!

I have a better question – Who the hell are any of you to decide what a relationship should be?
‘What’s the point of being married if you’re not going to be monogamous’ you ask? Here’s the answer – the point is none of your GD business that’s what. If it doesn’t involve your relationship then it doesn’t involve you.
YOUR definition of marriage is not THE definition of marriage. Get over yourselves.

calm down queers. I am not supporting neither argument but the ultimate classy objective of marriage is to have a “monogamous” relationship. I do agree you can do “whatever” you like as long as there is agreement between you and your partner, BUT in order to win an argument of demanding gay marriage: we homos need to adhere to social norm as it defines marriage. Period.
You can’t have everything at one time. The Norm is what the society defines it as norm. But if we continue acting eccentric, we will just be dismissed as irrational. Gays has to potray that they stick to the “rules” if they want to win majority support.
Any fires??

nice deep throating
annoying comments

WOW – so many pros and cons. I agree that if you’re not going to be monogamous, then why get married? Just be fuck buddies that share expenses, because essentially that’s what you become. Cooper – Not every person is sexually polygamous .. if that were the case, everyone would cheat and that would be the accepted norm. Growing up, I had no examples of divorce, adultery, or unfaithfulness. Maybe I was sheltered, but my parents, their friends, my siblings – they married and committed and kept their commitments to remain faithful. And you’re right, Coop – if we weren’t promiscuous, there would be no STD’s. Imagine that .. a world of no STD’s. Wouldn’t it be WONDERFUL? Marriage, no matter what your “culture” (if that’s what you want to call it), was never intended to be stepped out of. Even in polygamous mormon sects (and no I don’t promote that either), the husbands stays faithful to his wives and they stay faithful to him. If that’s what you want to have in your life (gay mormons? interesting ..) then by all means go for it. But don’t try to make it acceptable to call yourself married and OPENLY step outside of your marriage with a different complete stranger every night. That’s not a marriage – it’s just fuck buddies who stick it out together and perhaps share the finances.

Plenty of straight porn stars, prostitutes and strippers are married. The only person you need to make happy with your marriage is the person you’re married to.

John, you are absolutely right. There is no need to marry if you want fuck the whole town. Commitment is onething some of us needs to learn.

i think a lot of the people who think monogamy is *the only way* to be married need to take a look at the ancient romans. they’re the ones who started a lot of what we practice in modern marriage…culture? the rings, the gifts, the vows, etc. but yet, THEY WEREN’T MONOGAMOUS! the men had a wife and he fucked her. when she wouldn’t give him sex, he either beat her, raped her, or fucked on of the household slaves.
i DO agree with some of the comments: your marital definitions and vows are not the same as everyone elses, regardless of sexual orientation; and, this whole “sanctity of marriage” thing is complete bullshit! the “moral right” mean to tell me that Britney Spears’ -/+30hrs vegas wedding is more sanctimonious than my gay best friends’ 12 year relationship, whether they’re open or not? get a god damn clue.

I always find it funny and hypocritical when straights say that gay marriage threatens the “sanctity” of their religous institution. The only thing that threatens the “sanctity” of marriage is a little thing called “divorce”. And since a divorce can only be recognized as legal by the local ordinances, that invites the whole “separation of church and state” argument. I won’t say marriage is pointless, but it definitely is used by those who want to have it both ways while denying it to others.

Marriage is nothing more than a legal contract between consenting adults. With that contract you get certain rights and benefits – tax breaks, inheritance tax breaks, the right to be responsible for each others bills even if you didn’t run up that credit card.
It has absolutely nothing to do with religion other than the fact that religious organizations think they invented it and have a right to keep others from a legal contract.

It doesn’t matter – the gay community will never win the marriage wars. Just look at California! It WAS legal, then prop 8 passed and now it’s illegal. Why? Because the gay community showed the rest of the state just exactly what they considered marriage to be – and the state didn’t like it. Here’s a thought … if you want the gay community to be accepted into the “norm”, act normal. Gay pride – half naked men dancing in a parade, men dressed as women, leather daddies, a celebration of decadence … NOT NORMAL! It’s not a heritage, it’s not your background, and it’s not a culture. It’s just plain weird to most. Going to work, dressing gender appropriately, not being so blatent about your promiscuity .. that SEEMS to be the norm. Why not try that and see how it works? I know I’m just talking to the wall, but just because you’re a gay man doesn’t mean you have to act like a woman. I know plenty of guys who have the “gay accent” who have the ability to turn it on and off at their whim … so why turn it on at all? If you’re a dude, be a dude. If you’re a chick, be a chick. And if you’re a chick trapped in a dude’s body, go see a psychiatrist.
Since someone mentioned the Romans, remember this. We aren’t in ancient Rome, we’re in the very modern US. When in Rome, do what you want, but when you’re in the US, trying to pass US law, why not try to do as the Americans do?

You guys have to be kidding me. We mo’s are gonna be able to be married legally on a federal level within 10 years. Talk to the younger generation, straight or gay- they could care less about this bullshit; they don’t understand why it is the way it is, much like you older guys didn’t understand why Blacks were treated as 2nd class citizens years ago. It’s only a matter of time. As for monogomy; it’s simply a choice. You guys that want monogomy, fine, for those of us who don’t, leave us alone- oh yeah and stop being on the DL. Just because I don’t want to lie to my husband about sexual activity outside the relationship doesn’t mean I’m not worthy of that relationship. We both play by our rules, and it’s no body else’s business. That doesn’t deny me the 1,100 laws that go along with marriage. Marriage is way more than sex if you’re gonna make it work…sexual infedelity and financial issues are what break up most couples, staight or gay- if you remove one from the table, and are both on the same page; your odds of cultivating a loving, caring, sharing long term relationship just went up by 50%. I’ve seen very very few monogamous gay relationships that lasted a long time- I’ve seen many more when the sexual aspect of monogamy was not an issue. Men and men interact differently between one another than a man and woman or a woman and woman; so all you nosey, judgemental, Christian-Judo guys- MIND YOUR BUSINESS. You may be gay but you’re forgetting we have a seperation of church and state in this country (believe it or not); while your foot is stuck in the Christian ideals of this country, your dick is up some guys ass…if you want to follow their ways, don’t pick and choose what rules you’re going to follow. As for me and my husband, we are tax paying Americans who demand equal rights in every aspect- where government and your repressed-ass selves have no business: stay out. Your foundation is in your bilbe- after you get all those stories down pat, and live up to EVERY writing- come talk to me; otherwise- butt outt.