Top or Bottom: Bradley Cooper

Talking about Bradley Cooper is so two weeks ago, but speculating about his sexuality is a topic that never dies. Don’t blame us! We’re not the ones posting blind items that very clearly point a finger at the so-called “Sexiest Man Alive”. It’s just the way things are! People think he’s gay. We don’t really get it… Kind of like that time we watched Burlesque with our lesbian friend, and she swore up and down that Cam Gigandet‘s playing for our team. We didn’t see that either. Maybe we just have really bad gaydar?

In any case, it doesn’t matter if Bradley’s actually gay or not. Today’s post is an entirely hypothetical discussion about whether he’d be a Top or Bottom. Consider the evidence—a) he has a great ass, b) he speaks fluent French, and c) nearly ninety percent of you would sleep with him. That last point’s technically irrelevant, but we thought it was worth mentioning.

We’re interested to see how this one turns out! The majority of you predicted that Alec Baldwin would lean towards the top, with a little over thirty-four percent selecting the Total Top option. Head over here to see the full results, or click through to masturbate to some pictures of Bradley Cooper.

- Dewitt

Break on through to cast your vote:

If we’re to believe Wet Hot American Summer, the answer is “Total Bottom”.