Would You Hit That?: American Idol’s “Wolf” Hamlin

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Fuck yes. Yep. Absolutely. Will do. Si.

American Idol started up again. The ratings are low (I blame J.Lo. I also blame J. Lo for not being able to geographically target my Tweets, the Dow Jones, and that irritating woman at the bank). Those ratings are to improve by one Non-Nielsen homosexual if Jason “Wolf” Hamlin keeps moving forward in the competition. He’s a MECHANIC. A BEAR MECHANIC WHO CAN SING. I haven’t been shooting this much precum at Idol since the oil rig guy.

But enough about my tastes, would you get on this brawny bear?

p.s. Ryan’s bullshit “I’m glad you’re not kissing me, dude” is so transparent. He was practically strapping on knee pads in his highlighted head.

- J. Harvey