Hunting Season: White & Latin Only
Alright! It’s time for a confession! When I first heard about it, I was extremely skeptical of Hunting Season. A gay web-series about four friends living in New York and sharing details on all their scandalous hook-ups? There were just so many things that could go wrong with that. But they didn’t.
After five short episodes, I’m hooked on this show. Much as I make fun of them in my recaps, I’m starting to become attached to these characters and their well-being. I want Nick to find a sweet boy who treats him well! I want TJ to find balance in his open relationship! I want Tommy to settle down with the nice, older daddy he so desperately wants! I want Alex… Well, I just want Alex to keep showing us his butt.
This week’s episode deals with the important topics of sexual racism, nightlife and seeing more of Alex’s butt. Watch it! If you need to catch up beforehand, I know just the place to do so. <— I’m talking about right here on Manhunt Daily. Never leave me. Never.
Click through to watch the episode and view our recap:
The episode begins with a vaguely masturbatory montage about living in New York. Fuck! Whenever people talk about how nightlife in New York is “legendary”, I can’t tell if I’m justifiably annoyed, or if I’m just jealous they’re getting lapdances from beefy go-go boys on Monday nights while I’m at home like this.
Real quote or fake quote: “What we do at night here sets a standard for the era.”
The Scooby Gang gathers at Alex’s New York City apartment (that he definitely couldn’t afford on a blogger’s salary). It’s raining outside, and Alex wants to hit the clubs!
Real quote or fake quote: “Who cares if it’s raining outside, guys? It’s raining MEN at the bars!”
As you can tell from these collected reaction shots, the rest of the Golden Girls aren’t too enthusiastic about going out in this weather. They hate-crime Alex with their eyeballs.
Real quote or fake quote: “Go out? In these shoes?”
Alex admits that he just wants to go out ’cause he’s horny. Surprise!
Real quote or fake quote: “Okay, you guys, I have a horde of umbrellas. Let’s stop being pussies.”
This is the expression of a friend who’s thinking, “You just sat on 17 dicks within the past hour. Please don’t expect me to let your inexplicable sluttiness dictate the entire direction of my life.” His eyes say it all.
Real quote or fake quote: “You just sat on 17 dicks within the past hour.”
Did you know that TJ is the best character on this show? I just found out.
Real quote or fake quote: “Sit down, shut the fuck up and smoke some weed with your friends.”
Spoiler alert! That’s a real quote. That is a real and very terrible quote. It’d almost be unforgivable if Tommy weren’t so fucking hot.
Real quote or fake quote: “Nobody’s going to be out until 11:30 anygay.”
Alex makes TJ read through the pages of some nightlife magazine. He’s really insistent about going out, despite the fact that literally everyone else thinks the idea is as terrible as Tommy’s last quote.
Real quote or fake quote: “Synth house witch rave piss party piano bar.”
Alex loves all of these ideas! He will go anywhere in the world, as long as his night ends with double penetration and/or a tongue-fucking for his man-cooter. This man will stop at nothing to get laid. It could be the apocalypse, and he’d be daydreaming about blowjobs and anal beads.
Real quote or fake quote: “You gotta stop with the Brooklyn hate.”
Nick’s face is the second best character on this show. He does not have the patience to fuck with Alex’s level of craziness.
Real quote or fake quote: “Guido, speedo, veto!”
After TJ recommends The Cock as a potential hangout spot, Tommy chimes in with a rant about how nightlife’s over. This might be the first sensible thing he’s said all season, because geez, going out in New York has become a shit show these past few years.
Real quote or fake quote: “You can’t even have sex there anymore. Only on Sunday nights. New York is over.”
Alex will have none of this. He informs everyone that nightlife is still happening, because there are still hot people outside. He wants everyone to go outside and see the hot people… Nick says he’s bored with seeing the same hot people over and over again, and Alex asks him how he’s ever going to meet a guy with that attitude.
Real quote or fake quote: “You know what’s over? Saying that nightlife is over.”
Apparently, Nick has met a guy at the book store! He likes brains and stuff. His last near-relationship didn’t work out, so maybe things are looking up for him! Maybe he’ll get married, move to the suburbs and turn his life into the plotline of that atrocious excuse for a television show, The New Normal…
Real quote or fake quote: “I got me a man!”
This is the part of the episode where Tommy rubs it in everyone else’s faces that dudes are lining up around the block to lick his balls. He essentially has a boy on call who’s already waiting with a rock hard dick and a lubed-up hole. Just waiting. Waiting for Tommy to slide inside of him.
Real quote or fake quote: “I’ve got, like, six twinks who’d fight it out ‘Hunger Games’-style to sit on my dick. May the odds be ever in my favor, motherfuckers.”
We swear we didn’t pay for this mention.
Real quote or fake quote: “Show me his profile.”
Tommy goes to take a piss. Nick and TJ poke around his Manhunt account, look at pictures of his eight-inch dick and find out that he’s a racist twat popsicle. TJ reads out loud, “White and Latin only, sorry guys, just a preference.” Meanwhile, Alex is worried that they’ll just get stuck staying in and watching Strangers With Candy.
Real quote or fake quote: “Whites only? What is this, some sort of ’60s lunch counter?”
In true white-person-in-denial form, Tommy denies that he’s racist and goes on about how it’s just a preference. His reputation as a twat popsicle lives on.
Real quote or fake quote: “I can’t be racist! In case you didn’t notice, I’m hanging out with an Asian RIGHT NOW.”
“That’s bullshit!” is what TJ’s saying in this screen-cap. He eventually storms out into the bathroom, but first, he reacts to this question from Tommy: “Who says I’m looking for Mr. Right?” You be the judge on whether the response below is legit.
Real quote or fake quote: “No, you just want to meet MR. WHITE!”
Remember that guy Nick met at the bookstore? He’s banging Tommy.
Real quote or fake quote: “Is there any fucking man in this fucking city who hasn’t tasted your fucking taint?”
Too much drama for you? Well, good news! Reese shows up in a wet t-shirt and shoves his tongue down Alex’s throat. Something tells me that, before the night is over, that won’t be the last thing he shoves down Alex’s throat…
Real quote or fake quote: “Hey, it’s Reese! I hope you douched.”
Just two dudes making out. Nothing to see here.
Real quote or fake quote: “Fuck! I can’t wait to jizz on your face and pound you like a whore!”
Just two dudes making out. Nothing to see here… Unless you’re Tommy! In that case, you’re seeing everything, and it’s maybe a little awkward in a very hot way!
Real quote or fake quote: “I’m in the corner, watching you kiss him. Whoa-oh-oh!“
Yikes! When Reese looks like a deranged serial killer caveman, he really looks like a deranged serial killer caveman.
Real quote or fake quote: “Me no like having audience!”
Alex is a flipping idiot. A flipping idiot, I tell you! Tommy offers to tag-team Reese with him, and he turns down the offer. Did he miss the part about Tommy looking like this and having an eight-inch cock? What a fucking idiot!
Real quote or fake quote: “No, why don’t you go lie down? Your cocks will be right in.”
Meanwhile, back in the bedroom, I made this thoroughly unsexy GIF of Alex doing a magic trick, where he pulls a shirt out of his pants and suffocates himself with it… J/Kzzzzz! Reese and Alex are about to do it up the butt.
Real quote or fake quote: “Did somebody say tag-team out there?”
Just two dudes making out. Nothing to see here.
Real quote or fake quote: “You know, you really should have invited Tommy…”
Just two dudes making out. Nothing to see here… EXCEPT THAT CREEPY PAINTING AGAIN. They really need to get rid of that for the second season.
Real quote or fake quote: “Tommmmmy! Why aren’t you inside of me?”
Reese should smile more often. When he’s got a big ol’ grin on his face, he looks like less of a lesbian and/or deranged serial killer caveman.
Real quote or fake quote: “What are you waiting for? It won’t suck itself.”
Regretfully, I didn’t create a GIF of Alex kissing his way down Reese’s body. You’ll have to watch the episode to see that.
Real quote or fake quote: “Your hole or mine?”
And here’s why you need to buy the uncensored episode. There was no possible way I could capture the amazingness of Reese grabbing Alex’s ass. Those few seconds were hotter than most of this year’s gay porn, I swear! This could only have been better if Reese got a firm grip on each cheek, spread ‘em apart and gave us a glimpse of what’s between… UGH! Alex, you’re killing me with that butt.
Real quote or fake quote: “Hey! It’s Tommy! Does anyone need any water? Condoms? Perhaps another throbbing dick to swallow?”
Real quote or fake quote: “That butt.”
Seriously, that butt.
Real quote or fake quote: “That butt.”
Back in the living room, Tommy is watching a fake episode of Strangers With Candy and laughing his head off. Never mind that two of his best friends are pissed off at him! Jerri Blank can make all of your problems go away.
Real quote or fake quote: “Look at that stupid blind boy! He’s bumping into things.”
Oh wait! I guess TJ and Nick are so high that they forgot they’re mad at Tommy. They come into the living room to watch Strangers With Candy. What will Alex say when he finds out everyone’s doing exactly what he feared?!?!
Real quote or fake quote: “LOL!”
Alex is too busy being covered in man-spunk to care that everyone’s being boring and watching Strangers With Candy. He just had sex with Reese, in case you couldn’t figure that out for yourself.
Real quote or fake quote: “This isn’t even the whole load! Three-quarters of it shot directly into my mouth.”
I guess you want to see Reese’s butt, right? I think it’s weird that he fell asleep before Alex could wipe the cum off his stomach.
Real quote or fake quote: “A cum rag is a man’s best friend.”
After cleaning himself off, Alex strolls back into the living room to find that all of his friends have made up. They are also very high.
Real quote or fake quote: “A-L-E-X! That spells Fandango.”
Tommy is very high.
Real quote or fake quote: “Did you get some sloppy monkey?”
Alex reveals that he topped Reese. Nick is surprised.
Real quote or fake quote: “The muscles in Reese’s ass are just as worked out as the rest of him.”
And then Alex got high too. Apparently, the moral of this story is that drugs are great, and you should smoke the marijuana if you want to have real friends.
Real quote or fake quote: “Drugs are the coolest.”
It’s been seventeen episodes since Alex’s blog was mentioned. Just in case you were worried, he’s still updating it with all his sexual escapades. Never mind the fact that the guy he’s writing about is sleeping right next to him… Alex doesn’t care! He’ll do what he wants.
Real quote or fake quote: “Dear world wide web, I love penises. Teehee.”
Look at this guy! Blogging! Living his dreams! Bye.
Real quote or fake quote: “I guess you don’t always have to go out to have a real New York night.”
Get the uncensored version at huntingseason.tv!