How’s your Tuesday afternoon treating you? Don’t answer yet! Once you scroll through the twenty-six contestants for today’s round of iPhone Wars, your negative feelings will fly out the window and be replaced by a raging erection in your lap. You need to stop sweating the small stuff, and start jerking off so furiously that sweat’s dripping down your forehead.
Thankfully, unlike today’s presidential election, you can vote for as many contestants as you’d like in the Battle of The Boxer-Briefs… So who are your faves? Would any of them qualify for your ultimate fantasy gangbang? What’s the meaning of life? I have so many questions today. So many.