Tom Daley Comes Out…As Straight
This is the part where you burst into tears and then slide down the wall dramatically. Or throw yourself on the coffin containing your hopes and dreams that Olympic swimmer Tom Daley likes dick as it’s gently lowered into the ground. Tom has confirmed the ugly rumors that he’s a heterosexual. Is he really fixing his mouth to tell us that he LOOKS LIKE THAT in a speedo and is vagine-only? How is that ok? This isn’t justice! THERE IS NO GOD.
“I think it’s funny when people say I’m gay… I laugh it off. I’m not. But even if I was, I wouldn’t be ashamed. It wouldn’t bother me in the slightest what people thought. But I can understand why I have a massive gay following – I spend most of my life half naked in trunks on a diving board showing off my bare chest. I often joke I wear more to bed than I do to work. But I’m cool with my gay following. It’s great to have gay fans even though my friends gently take the mick.”
To make this just a tiny bit right, I’m replacing “my friends gently take the mick” with “my friends gently suck my dick“.
What are your thoughts on twink supreme Tom Daley being straight? This is awful to ask, but do you believe him?
– J. Harvey
Check out more pics of Tom Daley below:
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