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January 23, 2014

Dan Osborne: The Bulge That Hypnotized Tom Daley

One of the best parts about coming out of the closet (well, more like “openly dating a man“) is that you have negative fucks to give when it’s obvious you like cock. Take the following video from the UK’s Splash in which twink extraordinaire Tom Daley is totally hypnotized by contestant Dan Osborne’s leopard print bulge. (See 2:02.) He could care less. It’s a bulge and he’s on it, world!

Tom is the host of the reality television diving competition, and Dan is sort of a UK version of The Situation. Except way hotter. And bulgier. Can you blame Tom? I’d ask for a private showing.

Osbourne says he initially resisted wearing the leopard print bikinis, but finally relented and grew to like them. Tom probably offered up some of that Olympic sponsorship money.

– J. Harvey

Check out more pics of Dan Osbourne below:

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osborne1

osborne21

uktv-splash-1801-1

dansplashcap2

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17 Comments - View all

  • Logan987

    Tom is totally tenting at 3:00

  • parole office

    “he COULDN’T care less” would have been correct. you realise that if he could care less, it means he cares sufficiently that it would be possible for him to care less. The correct phrase “he couldn’t care less” means that he cared so little that it would not be possible to care less… which was what you meant. There is nothing worse than Americans bastardising British slang and getting it wrong so it makes no sense.

  • Lollis

    I would’ve sworn that the male host and Dan were brothers.
    Dan is not only hotter and bulgier but seemingly far more intelligent than the related reference.
    Any who..you can tell that Tom was beside himself, and for good damn reason. London calling.

  • Lollis

    Sat down too hard on your night stick?! ;-p
    In the same breath, you express that there’s nothing worse than this. What does it say if you really believed that?! I’m sure you don’t..
    Boom! You’re even! The bed is thattaway >

  • Thank you parole office.

    No really, I’m not being a bitch. Thanks for the correction.

  • TheSagaOf

    Hot.

  • Jamie

    Gotta love Tom

  • Cool_Kid

    Yeah it looked like he looked down at the tattoo on the guy’s arm that the woman pointed out. He probably wasn’t looking at that guy’s bulge

  • Joe T

    I don’t think he was looking at the bulge. I think he was trying to figure out what that weird black bow thing is on the top of Dan’s swimsuit. It looks like he has a ball-point pen attached.

  • taggles

    the best part was both of them turning heads to and away from each other at 3:05 til the end

  • DAK23

    Oh, quit being so pedantic. How about English rhyming slang? Doesn’t that bastardize the language, too? An honest mistake doesn’t require insults. A simple, polite correction would have sufficed.

  • michael35

    Is Dan gay friendly?

  • stlacr

    this guy is so hot he almost made me start watching towie again

  • JW Vandenberg

    Dustin Lance WHO?

  • AdamAtlas

    Tom Daley can do me