Fuck, Marry, Block: American Horror Story

Ok, who watched American Horror Story last night? That shizz was EFFED UP. What was real? What was a dream? How did Jessica Lange get to be so completely awesome? Does Dylan McDermott always cry when he beats off? So many questions!

We just had to celebrate one of the more confusing (and masturbation-infused) shows on television with a “Fuck, Marry, Block”. There’s not a lot to work with. We can’t really include Denis O’Hare who plays the family-killing burn victim Lawrence Harvey. Not because he’s disfigured, it’s because his character wears fedoras! That’s becoming a sign of true evil.

We’ve got Dylan McDermott (sleepwalking Dad who whacks off), Evan Peters (TRULY psycho teen), and…let’s call him Fetish Ghost! Yes, the haunted house the family moves into has a ghost of the kinky guy in the box from Pulp Fiction. Ryan Murphy’s pervy!

You know how it plays. Fuck one, marry one, and block one on Manhunt!

– J. Harvey

For more pics, and to tell us your choices – Follow the JUMP:

Dylan McDermott

Evan Peters

Fetish Ghost

16 thoughts on “Fuck, Marry, Block: American Horror Story

  1. Dylan Mcdermott is damn fine!!!  Very cute ass!  That scene where he was jerking off and that cute butt…damn!

  2. Chuck Evan, Marry dylan and definatly fuck the fetish ghost mmmm pvc rubber can tie me up and fuck me anytime

  3. Fuck – The Fetish Ghost (Could be fun)
    Marry – Dylan (so I could fuck him repeatedly)
    Block – Peter (Yuck)

  4. Cute ass?  Really?  I was thinking “no ass” every time I saw it.  Very, very sexxy furry chest on Dylan though.  And Evan was much cuter in the show than he is in that pic.  (He’s the one I’d marry so I could fuck on a regular basis.)  The real tragedy, of course, is that an actress of Connie Britton’s range and subtlely is being forced to act with the monochromactic styling’s of McDermott.  The real question is, “Who did Dylan fuck to get this job?”  (Especially considering the rest of the cast:  Frances Conroy, Jessica Lange–in a role that should be the dream of every drag queen in the country, Denis O’Hare . . . .)

  5. So why are we messing around with this shit, when there is a Dylan McDermott jack off scene to look at???

  6. Fuck-Peter(he’s a total hottie and you know that all that built-up aggression would make for some hot-ass sex!)
    Marry-Dylan(he’s a hot-ass motherfucker! that masturbation scene… O.M.G.!!!
    Block-The Fetish Ghost(I’m not into all that weird shit)

    This show overall is pretty damn good! It’s really fucked up and I LOVE it! I can’t wait to see what happens next week! 

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