The Artist! The Artist! I saw The Artist! She saw The Artist! We were at a screening of The Artist! Have you seen The Artist yet? You havent? You cunt! It takes us back to the beauty of the silent film era! BLASPHEMER! So, I haven’t seen The Artist yet. But I have seen pics of its star, French actor Jean Dujardin. He won a Screen Actor’s Guild Award last night and he’s got an Oscar nomination. I’m into it. He has that Clooney vibe, but sleazy. He looks like he’d fuck like a champ, but then pretend he wouldn’t know you on the street when he was with another dude. Sign me up. My self-respect is at a minimum when it comes to suave French actors.

Does Mr. Dujardin do it for you? Vote after the jump!

- J. Harvey

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Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Fuck yes. Yep. Absolutely. Will do. Si.

American Idol started up again. The ratings are low (I blame J.Lo. I also blame J. Lo for not being able to geographically target my Tweets, the Dow Jones, and that irritating woman at the bank). Those ratings are to improve by one Non-Nielsen homosexual if Jason “Wolf” Hamlin keeps moving forward in the competition. He’s a MECHANIC. A BEAR MECHANIC WHO CAN SING. I haven’t been shooting this much precum at Idol since the oil rig guy.

But enough about my tastes, would you get on this brawny bear?

p.s. Ryan’s bullshit “I’m glad you’re not kissing me, dude” is so transparent. He was practically strapping on knee pads in his highlighted head.

- J. Harvey

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Ewan McGregor has been on my mind a lot lately. It all started when I expressed my distaste that Lenny Kravitz is playing Cinna in the upcoming Hunger Games film. My boyfriend’s immediate response was to ask, “Well, who would be right for the role?”

My mind drew a blank. The name Ewan McGregor kept popping into my head, even though I think he’d be an awful choice to play the character. Shortly after this conversation, Best Week Ever posted this picture of Ewan, and Naked Pictures of Your Dad nominated him for “Favorite Dick”.

Naturally, this seemed like a sign that I should ask… Would you hit that?

- Dewitt

Photo credit: Splash News

Click through to cast your vote:

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Who wants the swarthy hotness that is Enrique Iglesias? Here he is doing some yachting for the holidays, and showing off the upper bod. He would probably sell more records if he took his shirt off more, it’s nice.

Enrique claims to have been short-changed in the pants area, but has that ever stopped you from wanting to give it to him or take it from him? Note – his girlfriend, ex-tennis pro Anna Kournikova, is on the yacht as well, but we cut her ass out. We don’t need a reminder that he’s into the ladies. When we listen to “Tonight (I’m Fucking You)”, we imagine it’s about US not some tennis skank!

(via DListed)

- J. Harvey

For more pics of ‘Rique boating, Follow the JUMP:

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Wow, they are still handing out roses and making desperate women (desperate for fame) look ridic on The Bachelor. Here’s this season’s choice – Ben Flajnik. Ben’s deal  is that he’s a former competitor on The Bachelorette (his n’ hers ridiculousness) who got turned down by the girl in question when he proposed to her. Or at least that’s what the writers wrote. They also wrote him owning a vineyard. Hey, if you win – free booze to drink to dull your sense of regret until your scheduled break-up for the tabloids. What do you think of Ben? Would you squash his grapes? Oooo, that metaphor was all sorts of wrong.

He doesn’t look like THIS guy, that’s for sure.

- J. Harvey

For more pics of Bachelor Ben, Follow the JUMP:

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