Hey Washington, Haaaaaay! If all goes according to plan, Washington could be the next U.S. state to legalize same-sex marriage. Last night, the Senate voted 28-21 to pass the bill, and word on the street is that the House of Representatives will approve it within the next week.

Start preparing your victory dances in advance, Washingtonians! Woot woot.

- Dewitt

Awhile back, head celebrity supercouple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie declared that they wouldn’t make their union official until every gay person in the U.S. of A could get legally married. This was a nice gesture (fuck, my straight friends never even gave it a damn thought when THEY got married pre-it being legal here in Mass.) but then he went and made himself a lie-teller!

From his interview with The Hollywood Reporter:

“We’d actually like to,” he says of his seven-year partner, Jolie, “and it seems to mean more and more to our kids. We made this declaration some time ago that we weren’t going to do it till everyone can. But I don’t think we’ll be able to hold out. It means so much to my kids, and they ask a lot. And it means something to me, too, to make that kind of commitment.” Has he asked Jolie to marry him? “I’m not going to go any further,” says Pitt. “But to be in love with someone and be raising a family with someone and want to make that commitment and not be able to is ludicrous, just ludicrous.”

I’m choosing to read that last sentence as railing against the fact that gays can only get married in a tiny amount of states, not whining that he can’t put on a tux again and walk his corpse bride down the aisle because of his previous declaration.

Honestly, shit changes. If he wants to avoid a teachable moment with his needy ass child brigade (“Why Mommy and Daddy can’t get married because their gay friends can’t…”) so they can be ring-bearers and flower girls – it’s fine. I’m more concerned with the fact that goblin Jonah Hill got nominated for an OSCAR. AN OSCAR. Tilda Swinton, Michael Fassbender, and Patton Oswalt are roaming around feeling unloved and the star of Night At The Museum: Battle Of The Smithsonian got a fucking Oscar nod. Die, Hollywood, Die!

- J. Harvey

Straight NFL jock Scott Fujita shot a PSA in support of Americans for Marriage Equality. If I wasn’t jacking off to pigskin jocks before (I was), I am now (even more so)!

In the ad, the linebacker explains:

“I’ve been married for twelve years and I know that it is unfair to keep other loving and committed couples from getting married and protecting their families.”

Cleveland Brown Fujita player is among a slew of other famous types stumping for our equal right to get married. By the way, did anyone watch Oscar winner Mo’Nique’s vid? She tells it like it is! Hot.

Thank you, Scott. Let’s take a look at the PSA and some pics of Mr. Fujita. We want to marry our cocks to his ass in our own private wedding ceremony. Leave it to Manhunt to cheapen everything so you don’t have to feel bad about doing it yourself.

- J. Harvey

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You don’t have to be intelligent, open-minded, progressive or even tactful to be a mayor. You just have to put up enough signs on people’s lawns and stand at enough intersections stupidly waving so the 3 people who actually vote choose you. Janice Daniels is the mayor of Troy, Michigan. Before her election, Jan was unhappy when New York finally okayed same-sex marriage. She was so unhappy that she took to her Facebook wall (normally reserved for forwarding links about scrapbooking and proclaiming the pussy soaks over Patrick Wilson and Gerard Butler) and wrote the following:

“I think I am going to throw away my I Love New York carrying bag now that queers can get married there.”

Uh huh. After Janice was made mayor, her shithead status post was brought up and she had this to say:

“I was not even considering running for mayor when I posted that. I probably shouldn’t have used that kind of language, but… I was thinking for myself. My personal belief is that marriage is between one man and one woman… They are my personal comments and I posted them. I am not going to change my opinion… But… As mayor, I represent all members of the community, and I am honored to have been elected… I love all people and will continue to work towards promoting a vibrant City of Troy.

“The groups that despise me are digging deep to try to find something to worry about. They probably should start worrying about how they can best work with a new Mayor who believes that we live in a free country and we all have first amendment rights to speak our minds on any and all issues that are before us. BTW, I am still carrying my I Love New York bag.”

Well, that’s good news about the tote. Apologies – you’re doing it wrong, Jan. Last night, Mayor Daniels faced city council, local high school students, and Troy citizens who gathered to inform her ass that she’s a fucking bigoted idiot. Here’s my favorite from Councilman Dane Slater:

“I’m gonna be the first to let you know that you are not the victim here. You sent me a memo apologizing but it gave me the sense that you think you’re the victim here, and you are not the victim. The city is the victim.”

Well said. It was voted that the meeting will be continued, with Daniels’ status as mayor up in the air. Hopefully she will be packing her office belongings into her kitschy I Love New York tote and waddling out of there very soon.

p.s. This is painting in wide strokes but have you noticed that when a women has a problem with the gays, her hair is always jacked up? Seriously. You know why? Cuz’ she’s not letting the really skilled hair burners (WHO ARE GAY) near her head. She’s sacrificing her appearance for her bigotry. SO fucked up.

- J. Harvey (via Towleroad)

Janice won Keith Olbermann’s Worst Person In The World segment (2:28). Check out the vid after the JUMP:

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It’s our intention today to make your cock explode today. Ow, not literally. Dewitt introduced us to GORGEOUS rugby bloke Sacha Harding this morning. And I’m going to make your lunchtime sexier by posting these hot pics of Australian rugger David Pocock. Even his last name is hot.

Pocock isn’t just a skilled and sexy athlete. In a recent interview, he stated that he won’t be officially signing off on his marriage documents with his wife Emma until gays can legally marry Down Under. Wow!

Ok, it also occurred to me that it’s a REALLY good out for him if he decided shizz wasn’t working out. And he wanted to save on alimony. But I choose to believe it’s out of the goodness of his heart.

Hell, he could be T.I. and I would still consider fucking him if he looked like that walking on the beach in his Speedo. More pics after the break.

- J. Harvey

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