Happy President’s Day! It’s that day when we celebrate all things presidential (except the current one)! Because this is Manhunt Daily, we need to make it filthy! I’ve rounded up 10 of what I think are the hottest presidents the US has ever been gifted with/enjoyed/dealt with/endured (as American citizens know – it can vary), and you must pick one to fuck! Pretend you’ve been invited to the Lincoln Bedroom to get it on with one of these leaders of the free world!
Our first president – George Washington!
He had wooden teeth, so that might be a deal-breaker. But he was the original. And he’s on the money!
Our fourth president – James Madison
He’s not a bad-looking guy. The wig’s kind of a turn-off. Ok, I must confess, most of our presidents haven’t been lookers.
Our 11th president – James K. Polk
They’re looking slightly more human. If you’re a pacifist, you’re probably not going to dick around with Polk seeing as he led us into war with Mexico.
Our 18th president – Ulysses S. Grant
If you’re into hipster otters who won us the Civil War, have I got a president for you!
Our 26th president – Theodore Roosevelt
What can I say? I like problematic bears. (He was pretty much the original bear. They named the beloved bedtime companion after him. Which bedtime companion? Please note that his name isn’t “President Dildo.”)
Our 31st president – Herbert Hoover
I chose Herbie for sentimental reasons. I went through a phase when I was younger where I was really into older businessman types (No, I wasn’t a hooker. Yet!). Hoover looks sort of, kinda, if the lights were off a dude with whom I tricked once. He was terrible and quickly cured me of my brief fetish.
Our 35th president – John F. Kennedy Jr.
Oh, John. I would have been your Marilyn Monroe if only our paths had crossed. You were handsome, heroic, and from my home state. You were the first sexy president, and you’re still sorely missed (especially when considering the dick kick we’re dealing with now).
Our 40th president – Ronald Reagan
In many ways, Reagan was a great president. And maybe you’re into the whole Hollywood cowboy thing. In other, more important ways, he could have saved the lives of a lot of gay people. So fuck that guy.
Our 42nd president – Bill Clinton
Who doesn’t love Slick Willie (besides Republicans and that poor girl in the beret)? Bill Clinton was probably one of the more charismatic presidents we’ve ever had. Dude liked to fuck, but he went about it in a shifty manner. I guess if you’re into slick dudes with disarming accents….
Our 44th president – Barack Obama
The class act that is President Obama will not only go down in history as the first African-American president. He will also go down in history as “THE MOST MISSED PRESIDENT IN US HISTORY CONSIDERING THE ROTTEN FASCIST SOCIOPATH ORANGE THAT REPLACED HIM.”
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