Coming Out Month: Thank You Corey

An individual named “Corey” is mentioned in today’s member-submitted contribution for Coming Out Month. Naturally, this led me to cheapen his beautiful story by weaving pictures of male model Corey Kirk into his words.

Somehow, as a man who finds sexiness in nude torsos, the shape of a man’s butt and the whisper of a five o’clock shadow, we don’t think this particular member will mind these pics of Corey… Or at least we hope he doesn’t, because it’d be a shame to take down these shots of Corey Kirk’s bulge. It’d be a crying shame.

Yet that’s not what important here, is it? There’s a lovely coming out story waiting for you! You should consider reading it and then sharing your own.

– Dewitt

Photo credit: Chris Teel

Click through to read this member’s story:

To start, I guess I should say that I never had a role model or anyone there for me when I was coming to terms with my sexuality. I grew up in a family that not only thought being straight was the best thing, but it was the right thing.

Now, I had never been what you could call a “jock” in high school. I was the nerd. The kid who instead of playing “manly” sports like baseball or football, played golf or sat on the sidelines reading.

I knew there were whispers about me. I knew people thought I was gay, but I never let myself say it. I didn’t dare.

To come out in my town was tantamount to social suicide and ridicule, and my life was tough enough without having to deal with that. Home life was difficult already because I wasn’t living up to my conservative father’s expectations of being an athlete like he was. To add more, my very religious mother was always trying to set me up on dates with various girls, something I tried very hard to avoid.

It wasn’t that I didn’t like girls. I did. But only in a strictly “friends only” way.

For me, sexy was a nude male torso, the shape of a man’s butt, the whisper of five o’clock shadow on his face. I found myself daydreaming in class about guys, and it scared me. I should have been honest with myself back then, and it’s one of my biggest regrets that I waited so long. It wasn’t until I entered college that I realized a different life was possible.

My freshman year of college, I made many new friends, from all walks of life. I was a member of the student government, which put me in contact with all of the student organizations, including our Pride Alliance. I made several friends there and eventually came to realize what I had been hiding from not only everyone around me, but from myself.

I was gay, and I was proud of it.

It wasn’t until my Junior Year of College though, that I was ready to tell my friends and family back home. I can still remember the night perfectly. We were sitting around a fire in my best friend’s backyard in October (Massachusetts falls are perfect for sitting around a fire drinking beer).

I don’t know what caused me to say it, and to this day, I can’t figure it out. There was a lapse in conversation, a contemplative silence, into which I suddenly blurted, “I’m gay.” I shut my eyes and waited for the insults, the shouts, the hurt and the pain.

But it didn’t come. No one said anything of the sort.

They looked at me and my best friend, Corey, the one who I told everything to. The straightest guy I knew, the one friend I was most afraid of telling said, “So? Did you think we would be upset?”

I was shocked. My eyes filled with unshed tears. This had gone far better than I had ever expected. Nothing changed over the course of several months. My friends didn’t back away, everything was still the same. I was the only gay member of our circle of friends, but it didn’t matter to us. If anything, it made us closer.

Of course, there was still a problem. My parents were still in the dark, and I had no idea how to tell them. I dreaded it more than going to Physics class.

But, as before, life found a way.

It was early February, and my best friend and I had just gotten back from seeing a movie. My mother was out and my dad was just getting home from a long day at work. He was not in a pleasant mood and said an offhand comment about me spending too much money.

As we climbed the back steps, my dad and I kept arguing. By the time we were in the house, we were yelling at each other.  It was over nothing important—money, finding a job, finishing college. It was like we were just yelling for yelling’s sake. And then he said something, “You’re going to be a failure. I just know it.”

I saw red, tears streamed down my face, and I screamed at him, “Dad I’m GAY!”

The look on his face was like he had just been punched in the gut. He spoke quietly to me, “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t accept it. You’re condemning yourself to a life of misery.”

I was shattered.

I had hoped my dad would be somewhat accepting, that over time he could handle it, that we could move on. All of my hopes and dreams came crashing down around me.

I sprinted from the room and headed downstairs to my room, sobbing. Corey didn’t follow me. He went to my dad.  To this day, I don’t know what was said, and neither of them are telling. All I know is that they talked for an hour, and after that, my dad came to me and apologized for his actions.

Needless to say, my mom took it about the same way, but in the end, she accepted it as well. It’s been seven months since I came out to the world, and I’ve never been happier. I graduated college with more friends than I imagine, and I’m trying to find a job in Cambridge, and a boyfriend now too. My life is better than I ever dreamed, all because I took one little step.

But, I can safely say that I owe everything to Corey. If it hadn’t been for him, I doubt I would have made it this far. Thank you Corey. I love you.

___________________________________________________________

Head over here for details on how to submit your own story, or click below to read more: