Remember this kid? If he hadn’t hit puberty and joined Kazaky, he would have posted a new YouTube vid in which he informed all of Richard Simmons’ many competitors that they are, indeed, basic. Richard just fucked us in our twink asses with “Hair Do” and I… Argh, I sound like Boulangerié Knowles. This is not authenticity! Do I really love this song? No. Do I really need to write an “ironic” (I’m using that term incorrectly but so did Alanis Morissette and that Canadian Mountie made BANK) post about how amazing this song is when I’m really shitting on its head? No. The next paragraph is going to be so much truth. I swear to you.
This song is messy like a Cher wig made out of newspaper. Richard, dear? No. Stop. This novelty track won’t even yield a passable remix. Daft Punk would have to exhume Peter Rauhofer and somehow re-animate his corpse to collaborate with them on one to save this mess. Let’s put it this way, Richard name-drops Jose Eber on this. Actually, that might save the song.
HOWEVER, this lyric video is delightful. We need more gayish homages to video games and neon Richard Simmons heads. If there’s an actual video for this shit, Richard needs to fly in on a laser-colored Deal-A-Meal card and just keep trying on different wigs. He shouldn’t even bother to lip-synch. That would be enough.
Oh, one more positive comment about “Hair Do” by Richard Simmons. He didn’t superimpose his head on wildlife. That deserves a hug. And a reach-a-round. I can only imagine what’s in Richard’s P-Town Pete gym shorts, so you’re going to have to reach in there for me.
– J. Harvey
Watch the lyric video for “Hair Do” below:
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And while we’re at it, let’s exhume Roger Ebert to rewrite this review.
you guys running out of material?—Jason Cameron shirtless, now there is an idea
He also has a music video out now – it’s great
You should find less horrible tags by the way