HEAVEN FOR PERVERTS, THE INTERNET – In honor of the holiday known as St. Patrick’s Day, the gay pornographic website MEN.COM is offering a limited-time 20% off discount for horny individuals across the world. The website has bragging rights as one of few online destinations that offers brand spanking new hardcore man-on-man content on a daily basis.
Their impressive roster of exclusive models includes such notable names as Paddy O’Brian, Jarec Wentworth, Bennett Anthony and Colby Jansen, and they regularly produce critically-acclaimed series like 2014’s smash hit “Stepfather’s Secret“. An estimated 967 zillion loads of semen have been liberated from scrotums their owners’ balls thanks to MEN.COM, and some sources say the site has even inspired women to play with their clitorises and other lady parts.
We have confirmation that one highly-respected homosexual journalist—who’s rumored to replace Manhunt Daily blogger Dewitt after his inevitable mental breakdown—will be placing several fingers into his anus while dreaming about all the MEN.COM models he wants inside of him. A panel of award-winning scientists has insisted there is literally no reason to not take advantage of this sale, so please do not listen to any unstable lunatics who would tell you otherwise. Anyone who doesn’t like MEN.COM should shove a traffic cone up their loose, slimy hole and shut the fuck up.
Photo credit: MEN.COM
Browse through twenty clips you could watch for 20% off below:
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1. Matt Anders and Paul Walker in “Sex, Lies and Surveilance Pt. 1“:
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2. Damien Crosse and Jalil Jafar in “Sex, Lies and Surveilance Pt. 2“:
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3. Gabriel Vanderloo and Dani Robles in “Sex, Lies and Surveilance Pt. 3“:
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4. Max Toro, Denis Vega and Jessy Ares in “Sex, Lies and Surveilance Pt. 4“:
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5. Bennett Anthony, Dirk Caber and John Magnum in “Pretty Boy Pt. 3“:
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6. Bennett Anthony and Jacob Ladder in “Surprise Gift“:
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7. Bennett Anthony and Jack Radley in “My Brother In Law Pt. 7“:
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8. Bennett Anthony and Sean Duran in “Tattooed and Screwed“:
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9. Jessy Ares and Gabriel Vanderloo in “Him Pt. 1“:
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10. Denis Vega and Bruno Bernal in “Him Pt. 2“:
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11. Jessy Ares and Nick North in “Him Pt. 3“:
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12. Jessy Ares and Bruno Bernal in “Him Pt. 4“:
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13. Jarec Wentworth and Nicoli Cole in “The Listener Pt. 1“:
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14. Jarec Wentworth and Dylan Knight in “The Listener Pt. 2“:
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15. Jarec Wentworth and Seth Santoro in “The Listener Pt. 3“:
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16. Jarec Wentworth and Colt Rivers in “Forever“:
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17. Paddy O’Brian and Bruno Bernal in “Hard Knox Pt. 1“:
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18. Paddy O’Brian and Alexis Belfort in “Hard Knox Pt. 2“:
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19. Paddy O’Brian and Dakota Vice in “Hard Knox Pt. 3“:
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20. Paddy O’Brian and McKensie Cross in “Hard Knox Pt. 4“:
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I really hope Men.com films a Christmas/Santa scene while Bennett Anthony still has that beard. I’m into that. Not enough holiday-inspired porn.
Bennett is so ridiculously sexy with those bushy beard isn’t he?
Hot stuff
The inevitable mental breakdown has already happened. It’s the inevitable suicide at this point. Finding it harder to justify your salary without the only site that really worked?