I was so into Rooney Mara as the punked-out, depressive, bisexual hacker chick in the upcoming The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, but then she opened her fool mouth and started talking shit about one of my fave rave programs, Law & Order: SVU. Mariska Hargitay needs to backhand this pale twat. Benson and Stabler are the hotness (we miss you, Stabler) and this bitch needs to be grateful for her first job! Anyway, we’re here to talk about dick…dick you want to fuck, dick you want to marry, and dick that is getting NOWHERE near your Manhunt profile. So we’ll use Rooney’s movie.
Daniel Craig plays the male lead, former ER doc Goran Visnjic plays an employer of “The Girl”, and someone named Yorick Van Wageningen plays someone named Bjurman. Honestly, I included the guy for his name alone. I’d fuck his name if it were a person. It just sounds like he has a huge hog, doesn’t it? Vote after the jump!
– J. Harvey
Daniel Craig
Goran Visnjic
Yorick Van Wageningen (definitely has a large wang)
Fuck Craig, marry Visnjic, and most importantly, block van Wageningen – because if the American version is going to be even grittier than the Swedish, then once you see the rape scene, you won’t want to go anywhere near him, no matter how nice he is in real life.
Fuck Craig, marry Goran, block the last fellow.
I still think it’s weird they’re remaking such a recent movie. Oh well.
I want to fuck and marry Daniel Craig. What were the options again?
Yorick Van Wageningen is sexy as hell, too. Love me some blonde scruff.
Can I have a polygamous marriage with Goran and Daniel, fuck the hell out of both them, and block the last guy? If not, then fuck Daniel, marry Goran, and block the bear.
Fuck Goran, Marry Daniel Craig and block Yorick. I’ve had it bad for Craig since Casino Royale, the suit then the blue speedos….. I had to control myself!
wow hard choice. unlike dewitt you actually like attractive MEN. i can’t decide but i’m leaning toward a threeway with yorick and craig.
Yes, you can do whatever you want. “Fuck, Marry, Block” is versatile. Or something.
Fuck Daniel, that man is just pure sex and masculinity. Marry: Goran so I can go and fuck around with Daniel
Block: Yorick. He’s just not hot enough and would make me want to fuck around on Daniel with Goran.
block all three
Block, Block and Block….ew, yuck, and gross!
I’m excited as fuck to see this movie! Loved the books and the Swedish films!
Daniel Craig, Daniel Craig, the other two
I couldn’t have said it better!