Fuck, Marry, Block: Jerseylicious

I was up until midnight on Sunday night. This is unusual for your Manhunt Daily co-blogger, because he needs to be up bright and early to write about cocks and the hot guys to which they’re attached! The reason for my night owl behavior? This HORRIFYING show on cable called Jerseylicious. Riding the coattails of the nightmarish Jersey Shore crew, Jerseylicious depicts the goings-on in a New Jersey hair salon called Gatsby. Loud shrieky women with pronounced “New Joisy” accents, scorched earth tans, giant hair, and garish accessories fight over boyfriends, curling irons, and concealers. I couldn’t stop watching. All I could think was “do the regular people in New Jersey hate these people? Are there protest marches?”

Jerseylicious has some semi-attractive guys, too. If you like em’ young, dumb, and full of cum. You, too? Filippo is the intern at Gatsby. Lorenzo is his best friend, who has dated TWO of the hairdressing harridans and is himself failing out of beauty school. Anthony is the slightly older gentleman who owns his own salon but works part-time at Gatsby. Your mission? You must fuck one of these men, marry one of them, and block the remaining guy from your Manhunt profile.

– J. Harvey

To see pictures of the Jerseylicious men in question, Follow the JUMP:

Filippo

Lorenzo

Anthony

17 thoughts on “Fuck, Marry, Block: Jerseylicious

  1. and Lorenzo is actually doing well in beauty school, its Filli thats fucking up

  2. Speaking as a born and raised Jersey boy who worked at a bar on the Jersey Shore…  I’d block all these douchebags and wouldn’t touch their cocks for anything.

  3. I wouldn’t touch either of them with a used dick if someone was pushing from behind!

  4. My relative produces this show.  Everyone  knows it is total trash…. That said,  I met the whole cast (minus Lorenzo) and couldn’t be more surprised how nice all of them are.  Anthony – totally cool and Fillipo is charming and really nice (he even gave me a kiss on the cheek and knows i’m totally gay…).  The only loon on the show is Alexa – a total wack job…  The show couldn’t be more fake but look at the advertisers… It is a hit…  Again, the whole cast is super nice so give them a break!  They are making money where its difficult to do…

  5. I got totally addicted to Jerseylicious.  It’s like not being able to take your eyes off of a bloody traffic accident.  A friend of mine, who had never heard of it (other than it was trashy) started to watch at my encouragement because he was from that area and goes back to visit his family.  Imagine his shock when he saw Filipo – he had met him and struck up and acquaitanceship with him at the same work-out place they both go to.  My friend had no clue.  He said the guy is actually very nice and is friendly, open and accepting of everyone without the smallest bit of judgementalism.  That proves that, somewhat sadly for us, that Filipo isn’t gay.

  6. What makes the show so fun with its trashiness (and as I stated below, I’m totally addicted to it), is its ethnicity.  Everyone is so Italian.  But it does need  more other ethnics.  Tell your friend to throw in a few Slavs (there are tons of them in that area – you can’t throw a dead cat without hitting an onion dome on a church) and a few Jews.  Italian Catholics are fine, but they can’t play the guilt schtick like Slavic Catholics and Orthodox, as well as Jews.

  7.  As a TRUE  Jerseyan (  born & still reside ) I find shows like Jersey Shore & Jerseylicious  2 be a complete  embarrassment 2 all of the good PEOPLE of the GREAT STATE of NEW JERSEY . BTW  I would  FUCK NONE  !   MARRY NONE  !  &  BLOCK  ALL !

  8. I have never seen the show…but based on the pix above. I would fuck Anthony and then Lorenzo, wouldn’t marry any of them and depending on what happens above would determine who I’d block.

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