Fuck, Marry, Block: The Real Househusbands Of New Jersey

Bravo’s Real Housewives Of… reality television brand has the whole “vapid, shrieking, egomaniacal leather-faced women screaming and punching each other” genre on lock. You can watch maybe five minutes of any of these shows before getting an intense migraine and wondering if humanity should just tap out. Nevertheless, it’s a ratings bonanza. The Season 3 premiere of The Real Housewives of New Jersey subjected viewers to the classic elegance of a series of brawls at a child’s christening. Yeah, ok, I watched it. Shut up.

It raised a question, though. What would I do if I was forced to “Fuck, Marry, Block” New Jersey’s finest? What would our readers do? Cast member Teresa Giudice‘s husband Giuseppe (“Joe”) Giudice and her brother (and new castmember Melissa‘s husband) Joe Gorga have figured prominently on the show this season. Mama bear Caroline Manzo‘s beloved and somewhat sensible (compared to some of these other psychotic gorillas) son Albie has been part of the show since day one. Which one of these paisans would you fuck, which one would you marry, and who gets blocked on Manhunt? Let us know in the comments section!

– J. Harvey

To see more pics of The Real Househusbands of New Jersey, Follow the JUMP:

Giuseppe (“Joe”) Giudice

Joe Gorga

Albie Manzo

18 thoughts on “Fuck, Marry, Block: The Real Househusbands Of New Jersey

  1. F: Giudice, because I bet he has a nice thick cock and talks dirty.
    M: Gorga, because he’d make good arm candy.
    B: Manzo, because he’s boring.

  2. the new guy george is so fuckin hot .i would take him anytime,, I think this is the closet guy that would let you blow him ( i know let me have my fantasy guys )
    So can anyone tell me if Albie is gay, i see the show and think that he is but they have never said he  was out ( but never see him with a girl , only his boy friends)

  3. F: Gorga, he’s hot
    B: Giudice, just gross
    M: Albie, he’s the whole package

  4. F:Albie (I’d rather Gorga, but see my reason below)
    M:Gorga (He has $$$$$)
    B:Giudice (He’s broke)

  5. Block, block, block! But then again, I don’t watch this trashy show, so all I can go on is looks.

  6. Holy crap. Can I block them all? It looks like the casting rejects from The Sopranos

  7. F: Albie – he’s just too adorable
    M: Gorga – married I’d get to F him all the time
    B: Giudice

  8. I wouldn’t marry any of them but I’d fuck them all, especially Joe Gorga…he’d never walk the same way again.

  9. ALBIE – I’d eat out hims ass DEEP then fuck him very hard til he screamed like a whore!
    Joe Gorga – I’d tie him up and shove my fist up his ass til he cried like a bitch!
    The rest, I’d block!

  10. I don’t watch these shows to know who is a douche, dick or stud but that Albie looks pretty damn hot.  Fuck and marry.  Block Joe.

  11. assuming more ideal conditions, i’d fuck both giudice and gorga.

    i think.

    never-the-less, it’s unlikely i’d want to marry any of them..

    ..i have no opinion on manzo, one way or another; also, under these more ideal conditions, i probably wouldn’t want to block any of them.

    but, if we are talking about The Real World Conditions, here..
    ..i’d likely block the lot of them.
    and, nominate their profiles for deletion due to their gravely offending the entire planet with their very existence.

  12. Fuck: Joe Gorga
    Marry: Albie Manzo
    Block: Joe Giudice

    Didn’t even have to think about it lol.

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