If I Were Beyoncé…I Would Destroy Howard Stern

Howard Stern somehow got his hands on the unedited board feed from Beyoncé‘s “If I Were a Boy” performance on The Today Show. The only way this won’t be the most terrifying thing you hear all day is if William Hung records a song that samples fingernails scratching on a chalkboard. Seriously! 

To give Ms. Fierce some credit, Stern and his crew pointed out that she probably couldn’t hear herself that well… but I didn’t even realize sounds like this could emerge from a human’s body. It’s like someone was shoving a butt plug up her ass every time she tried to hit a note. Don’t believe me? Listen for yourself.

– Dewitt

UPDATE: Rest easy all you single ladies, turns out this was a hoax.

To watch the original performance, follow the JUMP:

6 thoughts on “If I Were Beyoncé…I Would Destroy Howard Stern

  1. Doesn’t matter, she can still sing well. You don’t know what the circumstances surrounding this were. Still, it sounds really bad…

  2. How far did you listen, navymscle? I was about to say exactly the same thing, it wasn’t that bad at first, despite the nasty comments they were making – then she got to the high notes. It’s not pretty. World’s shrillest falsetto.
    Now, I still think she is a good singer, but, yeow!

  3. Ugh. And once again Howard Stern and his cronies prove how despicable they have truly become.

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