I had NO clue what the motherfuckers from Mumford & Sons looked like until I got an e-mail from my mama and personal fashion designer Tuná Knowles. She was all like, “Boulangerié, GURL! I am popping my pussy for a pork chop to this song by some English motherfuckers. You need to get right with your life and look at these hot pieces of DICK.”
Now, you KNOW Ms. Boulangerié Knowles doesn’t usually fuck with bands who make music for ratchet white chicks who ain’t eat NOTHING but kelp, but I ain’t gonna turn up my nose to a hot piece of DICK. You might remember that I just got pumped in different holes by the Backstreet Boys and One Direction, and these days I’m feeling kind of empty if you know what I’m saying! Basically, I need to get FUCKED!
So I hit the play button for my mama and, a few minutes in, I had to e-mail back her triflin’ ass: “Bitch PLEASE! Can you not see that these motherfuckers are Ed Helms, Jason Bateman, Will Forte and Jason Sudeikis? How desperate could you be to ride THOSE dicks?” Then I Googled these Mumford cunts, and I immediately had a psychic vision like that HOT pussy-licker Raven-Symoné. It looked a little something like this:
Except instead of some UGLY-ASS dude, it was your very own Ms. Boulangerié Knowles swallowing four hot loads from Marcus Mumford, Winston Marshall, Ben Lovett and Ted Dwane. I could already taste their JIZZ dripping off my lips, and it was sweet like HONEY. Carey Mulligan needs to sit her ass down and let me fuck her husband is all I’m SAYING. I bet his dick is THICK as a beer can.
MMM! You know I’m right.
Watch this dumb ass video with some “celebrity” motherfuckers below:
_______________________________________________________________________________
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE…
–
–
Be the first to reply