Every year, millions of men suffer from the fear that their penis isn’t fancy enough. They lie awake in bed every night, agonizing over the fact that their penis is not, in fact, covered with major bling. While they may feel hopeless and alone, there’s a place for those men to go and solve their problems.
For as little as $17.95, these men can expand their sexual horizons and increase their official P.F.F. (Penis Fanciness Factor) by double, triple and (in some rare cases) quadruple! Our penis jewelry collection is expansive, and while most products are intended for sounding—like the bejeweled Cock Plug with Harness seen above—there are also less extreme options like The Cobra Penis Cap, The Penis Head Glans Ring and The Steel Ball Head Ring.
Even better? We’re offering a 15% discount on ALL penis jewelry from now until July 1. To take advantage of this offer, enter the coupon code “MHDISCOVERPJ” upon checkout.
Go do it! Make your penis fancy!
– Dewitt
Click through to see more penis jewelry:
Get into some Game of Thrones roleplay with this nifty Penis Crown:
Make sounding pretty with the Ruby Wave Urethral Anchor:
Keep it simple with the Silicone Cum-Thru D-Ring Penis Plug:
Recommended for beginners! The Mortal Coil Cum-Thru Sound:
Model not included (unfortunately). The Cum-Thru Penis Plug:
Turn your stream into a shower with The Libertine Faucet Plug:
Does anyone know if this last one actually works? I’m sort of fascinated by it.
Ouch!!
No thank you. I stick my penis in, not stick stuff in my penis. Lol!
My urethra is hurting from just looking at this crap!
oh lord…
omfg!!!
omg
i just cringe at the thought
exactly
I know sounding is a “thing,” but ouch ouch ouch wtf ouch ohHELLno ouch ouch OUCH fuck get those images out of my head fuck ouch FUCK.
the only thing I can think about, is trying to explain this to someone in the ER,
because it won’t come out!
I own a “penis crown”— NOT sticking anything in my dick!
Educate yourself about sounding. Â You feel relieved after “I gotta go”.. Â Sounding is like a mastubation from the inside out. Â You will cum faster than you think. There are videos out there with sounding in it. The items above are not for wear 24/7.Â
As for a Prince Albert. That’s another story.
If you’ve ever been tested for gonorrhea, you’ve encountered sounding. And a q-tip stuck down my head is as far as I want to go.Â
i have the cum thru penis plug, i enjoyed it, but i got my cock pierced and its kinda collecting dust now…
i tried the silicone ones too. not worth the money.
No FUCKING way !!!
Yeesh might as well get a catheter put in.
This all reeks of someone ordering too many of a weird object,….penis jewelry really? this is what we’re pushing? barf
I have that thing that is shown in the main picture (but without the chains to hold it in). Yes all of this looks scary guys but open your minds up to the fact that there are things which are outside your comfort zone that you might actually enjoy if you could just let go of your fears. Probably sucking cock was scary looking to you at some point…
That’s not as bad as you would think!
Love to sound my cock! It feels great. the penis plug gets lot of attention when you are in a shower,