Call me a big ol’ stereotype! My first gay crush was on a straight guy. Prior to attending college, I wasn’t comfortable enough to admit I could have romantic feelings for another man. Even though I was fucking guys left and right, relationships were simply out of the question. My official plan was to meet a cute girl, put a ring on it and have lots of babies. There was absolutely no stopping this plan.
But then I met Paul. He was a beefy football player (duh) who always rocked a bit of scruff, and he just so happened to be in the same freshman-level theater course. It started out as a matter of pure lust. I’d strategically place myself in the classroom, just so I could gawk at his muscular, hairy legs. When he was sitting in front of me? I’d keep my fingers crossed that I’d get the slightest peek at the waistband of his underwear.
However, things got a bit more serious when Paul and I were paired together for a dramatic reading. Despite the fact that neither of us were terribly good actors, he delivered his lines with so much passion that I started to get butterflies in my stomach. We began to acknowledge one another outside of class, and he could turn the shittiest day around by merely smiling at me.
In my impossible dreams, I imagined us dating through our four years on campus, moving in together and spending the rest of our lives in one another’s arms. He transcended beyond a masturbational fantasy, and I even turned down a few eligible gay bachelors in the glimmering hope that he’d turn around and realize I was the one for him.
Alas, this never happened. Yet the experience opened me up to the idea of dating other men, and I’ll always be thankful to Paul for putting things into perspective. So call me stereotypical if you’d like–a straight man was my gateway drug to loving other dudes. But that’s my story, and I’m sticking to it. How about you? Who was your first big gay crush?
– Dewitt
Had a huge crush on a fellow choir/theatre member. He was straight–and beautiful. Had all the kinds of goofy fantasies (goofy because based on the thinnest foundation) that you describe, Dewitt. Even managed to get us in the same dressing room for one of our musical runs. I came out to him at the end of the year thinking he’d express his undying love and affection. He didn’t, but he also didn’t get grossed out or offended. (Which is saying a lot for a small-town, Midwestern boy.) Through various circumstances, I had the great pleasure of meeting him and his fiancee almost a decade later–I was a proud ‘mo at that point and he had made his way as well. He told me he’d always wondered if he’d handled the situation well. I was glad to be able to tell him he had, and to show him a slightly more put together version of myself. It is amazing how crushes can pull us into a new reality.
Totally cliché, but my best friend. We got seriously close throughout middle school and high school, only for him to be shipped off to Florida 2 years before we graduated. Now almost 10 years later I find out that he felt the same way about me, but has found God now and has stopped such “Frivolous” activity. So much for big dreams.
I also fell in love with my best friend in high school. I spent every waking minute with him and am surprised I was able to keep my grades up as I was VERY distracted!
I also fell in love with my best friend in high school. I spent every waking minute with him and am surprised I was able to keep my grades up as I was VERY distracted!
What happened to Paul? Did you keep in touch (even though you didn’t get to touch)?
My high school crush was someone named Ben. He was tall, dimply smile and light brown eyes. We shared a few classes together and during grade 9 science we sat together and I sometimes “accidentally” fall off my lab stool and grab on to his arm. Sadly he is straight though.
My first crush is also a straight guy. He has a pair of charming eyes. After my confession, he was still my friend for a while. But finally I decided to stop see him anymore. The love in my heart was torturing me so hard that I was unable to eat and sleep. So painful to carry the torch that I just ran away.
The first time has been engraved in my bones and printed on my heart.
I Ironically enough was madly in love with my dad’s Boyfriend. My father was always in weird male-male-female relationships my entire life on the down low and his main male squeeze was the most beautiful man in the world to me. Still is i guess, He pretty hight in the Airforce now, while my dad retired.
My first crush was on a guy who played the Tin Man in a bad community theatre production of The Wizard of Oz. I was a Munchkin and hopelessly in love. It didn’t end well…..
I had my first “gay” crush in my junior year in highschool. It was on my science teacher at the moment, he was 11 years older than me. Is something that I can’t really describe. The first time I saw him on the school hall my heart would skip a beat (seriously), and when we were in class I would start to stutter and breathe heavily (I know it sounds corny hahahaha). That was almost six years ago and now we are great freinds. He no longer teaches at my old highschool but we are really good friends and talk almost eveyday. He recently had his first child. (He still doesn’t know I had a MAJOR crush on him)
My first gay crush was when I was too young to remember how old I was(maybe 5 or 6). It was my older brother’s Italian friend, Tony(of course). His sister was my age and I regularly asked her what her brother was doing lately ;-)lol. I think it annoyed her that I was more interested in him than her. LOL
I wonder what he’s doing now (?;-)lol I think I’ll Google him and see if anything juicy pops up 🙂
I was in 7th Grade and I had the biggest crush on my 7th Grade Science teacher. I went to Catholic school and at that time the school was entirely staffed by either nuns or by matronly women. Then came “Mr. Frank” with his tall, thin/lean body and his black hair and that tuft of chest hair sticking out from his open collared white shirt…little did I know that years later we would run into each other in a bar one late night – me, now in my 20swith a new bf and he in his later 30/early 40s, sitting on a banquet bouncing a very younger guy on his lap! Agh! Coudda, Shoudda, Woudda…
As weird as it sounds, my step brother when I was 10. He’s 6 years older than me. Well, that was 11 years ago. Interesting thing is, he is now living with his boyfriend of 7-ish months, leaving his wife of 6 years and 2 children.
he was gay just…
you don’t just a book by it’s voice 😛
My first major crush was on a straight guy. I was in secondry school in 3rd year so I was about 14/15. What happened was I was kinda sorta crushing on a guy in my class named Ted, so I asked this guy Mike, who he seemed to be friends with, if he knew whether or not Ted was gay. So we ended up plotting me telling Ted I was gay(my first proper coming out i think) and asking him out. That failed but i ended up majorly crushing on Mike for the next three years any time i saw him i would smile he told me some songs to look up and they made me smile i was always trying to sit close to him (i was a bit of a stalker ill admit) and chat to him online and stuff and i told him twice of my intense crush both time i was in turned crushed still though Mike was my first major gay crush so ill always remember him for that.
My high school teacher and I fucked him. Everything since has been disappointing x
A guy I ran into my freshmen year of high school. We had the same typing class. He was a wrestler. I ended up in the same web design course with him over the next two years. I don’t know if he was gay or not. I was too timid to even approach him and he was also very quiet/shy. Rarely talked to him but managed to help him out a few times in web design.
I joined the cross country team with a friend my junior year and, low and behold, he also joined since the wrestling season had ended. Now that was interesting.
I was sad to see him holding the hand of a girl during his senior year but ‘easy come, easy go’ is what I told myself. It still was one of those, “Wow, I like other guys for more than just sex.” kind of realizations that Dewitt encountered.
I haven’t had a big crush yet. My first crush wasn’t a person i knew. he was someone on TV. IDK his name but he played the Red Power Ranger in the original series. Other boys wanted to be him i wanted to be with him.
And a side note did anyone else notice that the black ranger was black and the yellow ranger was asian?
massive, massive crush on my straight best friend from middle/high school. he moved in from out of town and I imprinted on him like a lost puppy. we spent all day every day together…he’d share a bed with me, sleep on my shoulder on car trips, had a pet name for me, loved to wrestle…was a body builder…ugh. gayest straight boy I ever knew.
everything about how I relate to men traces back to that fucked up relationship. considering I got slightly *more* action than a lot of people did in high school (hell, at least we slept together), I kinda think of him as a first relationship, though I’m under no delusions he ever felt the same. he once told me I made him wonder if he was some kind of supernatural being. he totally didn’t deserve it but he could probably show up on my doorstep in 40 years and I’d still take him. blah.
massive, massive crush on my straight best friend from middle/high school. he moved in from out of town and I imprinted on him like a lost puppy. we spent all day every day together…he’d share a bed with me, sleep on my shoulder on car trips, had a pet name for me, loved to wrestle…was a body builder…ugh. gayest straight boy I ever knew.
everything about how I relate to men traces back to that fucked up relationship. considering I got slightly *more* action than a lot of people did in high school (hell, at least we slept together), I kinda think of him as a first relationship, though I’m under no delusions he ever felt the same. he once told me I made him wonder if he was some kind of supernatural being. he totally didn’t deserve it but he could probably show up on my doorstep in 40 years and I’d still take him. blah.
I totally fell in love with a straight guy in my sophomore year of college. I didn’t know what was happening, but when he was away out of town, I actually would get stomach aches thinking about him. He got married. But who really knows….. Wish I could see him again.
my first one was yhe best friend. It always is. LOL. He always does that thing where he pretends to be gay and slaps my ass, flirts and shit. I don’t want to go there though haha
I think it is a rite of passage to fall for one straight man. Besides crushes in high school, my first romantic crush, that is someone I actually spent time with, was my friend and roommate in college. I came out to him my freshman year. I kinda had a crush on him, but nothing unbearable.
Then one year I had this small piece of metal stuck in my finger, it kinda hurt, but i didn’t worry about it too much. He saw it and said he would pull it out. It was in there pretty good and I was kinda really anxious about it, well ready to run and hide like a small child. He more or less had to hold me so I would keep still enough for him to remove it. It was quite a bonding moment and I was pretty ready to spend the rest of my life with him after that.
We are still good friends. I was even in his wedding.
I have a huge gay crush on Dez Bryant of the Dallas Cowboys, If you watch them play he shows his tight ass a lot and his big basket is always on display, back in my younger days i had a huge gay crush on Barry Gibb
I have a huge gay crush on Dez Bryant of the Dallas Cowboys, If you watch them play he shows his tight ass a lot and his big basket is always on display, back in my younger days i had a huge gay crush on Barry Gibb
I have a huge gay crush on Dez Bryant of the Dallas Cowboys, If you watch them play he shows his tight ass a lot and his big basket is always on display, back in my younger days i had a huge gay crush on Barry Gibb
My first crush was on my sisters boyfriend. He was beyond gorgeous… tall, amazing bone structure, dark hair, bright blue eyes. He was so amazing to me and when my sister would leave for basketball or soccer practice we’d play video games, watch movies, or go on the trampoline. Unfortunately, he turned out to be a major asshole… he got my sister’s best friend pregnant :S
hm.
now that i think about it, back when i was in elementary school, i had a rudimentary kind of crush on a fellow who was in my same grade.
(2nd?
3rd?)
i was not a Saint, when i was a wee lad.
but, at that age, i would not have known what to do with that boy, anyway.
and even if i did know.. ..what could have happened, as a result?
My cousin’s ex boyfriend while I was in High School and he was in College. Can still remember how I felt every time he walked into the room.
My first gay crush lasted about three years… He was either gay and didn’t know it, or a really REALLY friendly straight guy. When I came to realisation that I was into men and women, it slowly developed that I was attracted to women sexually, but men emotionally. I know that probably doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, but I think it was a bi-product of me never having been in a relationship with a man, and having been in a few with women. I.e. I knew what a woman was like emotionally, but I didn’t know what a man was like.
As such, little things that this guy would do that responded to my emotional needs developed this crush. Things like sitting next to me over his other friends, talking to me about deep and meaningful stuff etc. etc.
Unfortunately, it never really worked out. As it turned out, another guy was into him who knew him (let’s call him W) way longer than I had. He found out I was into W and this massive love triangle developed. The funny thing was, W never found out about either crush.
Me and the other dude who was into W had a massive fight one night and that changed everything. Even though I always said to myself that nothing would happen, that fight changed a lot. I started picking up on W’s flaws as a defensive mechanism to try and get over him and out of love triangle land. It was really unhealthy… Now I despise both of them haha.
Because it ended so badly (about 2 years ago), I really haven’t been able to develop those feelings for anyone else, male or female. It’s weird, because I know I am DEFINITELY over him. So really, my first gay crush, has been my only gay crush…
My First Crush was a guy named Christian P, My first Celebrity Crush an actor named Kevin Bernhardt and now Dwayne Johnson.
I was 12 years old visiting my aunt in new york city for the first time. Upon entering her apartment a gorgeous man suddenly walked out of a bedroom next to hers… he was 19, tall, fair skinned, body smooth and carved out by muscles and had a rough Czech accent– he walked over to me with nothing but a towel on and a big smile on his face… he was the nephew of my aunts previous roommate (her then current roommate)… his name was Xander. It was the first time I ever felt attracted to a man, the first ever crush…
Thinking about him now, if we were to cross paths now i would be without words!
Definitely my fifth grade math teacher. Handsome, athletic and a nerd…perfect! I was unable to ascertain the feelings that were running through me then. I do remember during Spring Camp and the 4H Club beach outing when he bunked with the boys as our chaperone and he would walk around in only his boxers. I was smitten by that man. It wasn’t until years later when I went nuts for my eighth grade math teacher, that it made sense. I was also sexually active by then, and it took only one after-school tutor session before student and teacher got naked.
Im still young now, i wont say how old but im in high school and i think im bi, all my friends are girls, all the guys at school hate me and call me fagget but i ignor it, theres a girl at school who likes me and shes hot but she has a twin brother who is drop dead georgous, so amazing , amazing muscles tanned deep brown eyes and id sooo tap that im pretty sure hes not gay tho so thats my first gay crush my one and only, unless you call Leo Giamani a crush ooft.
My first real gay crush was on a friend, who was probably the closest friend I had at all in high school, if not exactly a best friend. He came into my school in grade 9, and I mostly ignored him at the time, because he was in another class and richer and the way some people fawned over him annoyed me.
Then, in grade 11, somehow he got transferred into my class, and we struck up a friendship based on computer games, and somehow, for reasons that my self-loathing wouldn’t let me understand, he wanted to spend time with me.
He was always so funny, and cool. And he was beautiful – had this golden hair, and these blue-blue eyes that basically paralyzed me every time that I looked at him.
It’s been almost a year since I’ve seen him – we finished school, and I decided to take a gap year, and he and his family moved about 3 hours out of town, and I just haven’t really made plans to see him again. Because as much as I enjoy his friendship, pining over him is just to painful for me.
Hott Michael (yes with two T’s because he’s that good looking) was my first real crush, or at least the first one that I openly spoke about. Below is the story that was truly the climax of our Shakespearian romance.
Maybe one day I will put down on paper the prequel to this night and speak of our first official date. And by date I mean we went to see “Flight Plan” with a group of his friends and at the end of said date, he tried to set me up with one of his friends that was with us. Or I may tell the tale of the time I went to visit him at work at an amusement park and he sang to me, “One-Eyed, One-Horned, Flying Purple People Eater.” He was always the romantic. Or maybe, if you were to find yourself so lucky, I would tell the story of the time that I babysat his dog and I took a thirty minute drive in his Boxster with a fifty pound Rottweiler on my lap. The things you do for lust. But until the time comes you will have to suffice yourself with the narrative of . . . The Party.
I was invited to a party at his house. I actually had an address and everything. This guy clearly wasn’t as smart as I thought or he would have never given me such personal information. I was overly excited for the whole experience and I dressed in my best sex attire. I brought along some wingmen to insure that I didn’t look like a complete stalker/loser. The wingmen had to the perfect flavor of vanilla so as not to over-shadow the mint chocolate chip zest that I bring to a room. My friends, Ms. Messing and Munroe, were the perfect place holders.
We pulled up to Hott Michael’s three bedroom house that he shared with multiple roommates at around ten o’clock. The place was full of people we didn’t know and it was sort of awkward, but I was goal-oriented and therefore nothing could dampen my mood. Hott Michael greeted us and we all made introductions. The host with the most offered us a drink . . . vodka and diet tonic. You know you have reached the gay level of no return when you are drinking diet tonic. I wasn’t quite at that gay level yet, so I had a vodka cranberry. I quickly realized that Hott Michael was very preoccupied with entertaining all the guests and wasn’t focused solely on me. This was not going to do. I hadn’t come to this party to talk with the friends I brought with me. I began to try out tactics that would garner me some attention. These tactics quickly rose in their level of desperation.
My first attempt was to focus on his dog Mojo, an adorable Rottweiler puppy. I figured that if I could get the pooch to like me and force it to constantly stay at my side, than eventually Hott Michael would take notice of how enamored she was with me. Dogs are great judges of character. However, the little bitch was not cooperating and she too was distracted by the other guests . . . and I was still sitting there with my bland wingmen.
It had been close to an hour and Hott Michael had barely even noticed I was there. I had to try something new. I decided that I was going to fake being tipsy and try to get some notice through my drunken antics. I had only had one drink, but no one but Ms. Messing and Munroe knew this. I decided to walk right into the middle of the largest crowd I could find and join in on whatever was happening there. If I was going to be crazy fun drunk boy than I was going to have to go big . . . however, this began to snowball rather quickly.
There was a large group of individuals in the kitchen and one girl (whom I knew to be Hott Michael’s roommate) was sitting on the counter. I pushed my way through the crowd and plopped myself right up on the counter-top next to her. I began a conversation with her; making sure to slur as many words as possible and clearly the people around us caught on because they began to play, “let’s see what we can get the crazy drunk boy to do.” These people were not new to this game either; they jumped right into the big times and requested that I make out with the roommate. I quickly evaluated the pros and cons in my head. Cons, I would have to make out with this strange girl. Pros, it would create just the spectacle that I was hoping for and there was the chance that she had locked lips with Hott Michael at some point in her life and therefore I would achieve a second-hand kiss from the man of my dreams. I went for it! I gave her some of my best lip action because I would be damned if she was going to report back to Hott Michael that I was a bad kisser. I was on that girl with the same intensity that I would show to bacon-flavored doughnuts, if I could get my hands on such a thing.
Hott Michael hadn’t even noticed. I continued to play for a while longer but I was growing more and more disgusted with myself and the night was dragging on. I eventually made my way back to my friends and began to sulk. They weren’t having fun and aside from the occasional two word exchange with Hott Michael, I wasn’t making any progress towards my dream of getting a ring from him someday. I decided to call it a night, but I wanted to go to the bathroom before I left. I didn’t really have to use the restroom but I did want to try and find some mouth wash . . . I still had the taste of blond girl on my tongue. I found my way to Hott Michael and asked him where the bathroom was and to my utter surprise he offered to take me on a tour of the house . . . alone. I gay gasped silently to myself.
He began the tour with the downstairs which I wasn’t interested in because there were other people around. Soon we made our way upstairs where he showed me to the bathroom. I walked into the bathroom and as I turned to close the door behind me I came face-to-face with Hott Michael; he had followed me in. This portion of the story is a bit of a blur because my brain felt like it had been transported to some fantasy land where the man of your dreams wants to watch you pee. I’m not entirely sure how my face looked at this moment; but it must have betrayed me and showed the fear I had of busting out little Alpha in front of him. He offered to wait in the shower while I took care of business. Once I was finished, I washed my hands and then took my turn hiding in the shower while he too relieved himself. I contemplated sneaking a peek, but this was not the way I wanted to make my first acquaintance with Hott Michael Jr. We finished up this awkward tangent and continued our tour.
He showed me to his room and we decided to sit on the floor and chat for a bit. Not much actual conversation was going on. I was still in a bit of shock and I soon realized that he was a bit drunk. We mostly just sat in awkward silence until finally he decided we should rejoin the party. Hindsight being 20/20 I realize now that had I made a move, I could have probably achieved a make-out session with Hott Michael, but my “not entirely single” status at the time had prevented the idea from ever taking root.
We went back downstairs and my friends were waiting for me. I told Hott Michael that they were ready to go and ever the gentleman, he decided to walk us out. As we walked out the door my spirits perked up again; no longer was I saddened by my missed opportunity because I knew that at the end of a long night a goodbye was always accompanied by a hug. I did not know as I leaned in toward him, that this hug was going to be the hug to end all hugs. The hug of my lifetime. It started out as a normal embrace that I was of course enjoying every moment of. I took in every sound, smell and mental image I could in order to file in my long-term memory. But as the hug was ending and we began to pull apart . . . time slowed down. At first I didn’t realized why time was coming to a halt, I thought that I was possibly having a stroke in the arms of my lover. But it wasn’t a stroke, it was the world realizing before my brain did that as Hott Michael pulled away from our embrace his lips were moving closer and closer to my neck. The mere second that his lips rested upon my neck was the longest most blissful second of my life up to that point. As he released me from his grip and I looked him in his glorious face; I, much like Beyonce with that cancer kid, could see his halo. I stumbled my way back to my car without saying another word to Hott Michael. Ours was a love that required no spoken language.
I found out later that he went back into the party and hooked up with one of his roommates and the two of them dated for the next couple of years, but that is beside the point. I had had my moment in time with Hott Michael and it was . . . climactic.
Can’t really beat the remix of “Song for the Lonely”. Glad she hasn’t lost her touch, though. =)
Wrong thread. >_>
GoodChristianBoy, can’t you at least wonder that the guy he dated for some time could be you, if you went ahead in his room?
My first big gay crush was (and is) my kung fu teacher. His name is René, he’s a Mexican married guy with a hot body, very muscular and with a nice patch of hair.Seeing him exercising is my daily-happiness-pill. Yummy!
I was 15 (I’m 28 now) stereotypically it was my P.E. Teacher.. he was only 21 and i had perved on guys for a while but as soon as i seen him in his little footy shorts with his BULGE.. omFg..
@goodchristianboy.. is it publised yet?