Dave Matthews Band just released their new, ridiculously titled album Big Whiskey and the Groogrux King earlier this week. What better way to celebrate then discussing my shame over wanting to fuck the hell out of the lead singer?
While last week's Secret Sex object, Levi Johnston, was included because of his dabbling in Bristol Palin's Cindy-Loo-Va-Who-Who, this week is a bit more complicated. I'm not going to take some pretentious "DMB sucks" stance, because I honestly used to be really into them. Plus, I seriously fear the horde of obsessed fans who would send me Under the Table and Dreaming with the fishes for talking smack.
Due to personal reasons that I'd prefer not to go into, Dave Matthews' voice makes me want to die a little inside. With that said, his face makes me want to cum on it. I would also like to invade "The Space Between" his butt cheeks, and take out my frustrations on him for making the terribly annoying song mentioned earlier in this sentence. Yeah, I said it.
– Dewitt
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