With the new season of American Idol underway, I’ve been reminiscing over some of the previous winners and contestants. Kind of obsessively. Though my relationship with the show has slowly diminished over the years, I find it utterly fascinating to watch the show’s hopeful singers move on from a glorified karaoke contest into the real world. A real world where the music industry is stuck in the toilet.
Take Kimberly Caldwell, for example. After getting the boot from the second season, she moved on to become a correspondent for the TV Guide network. Now, eight years later, she’s finally releasing her debut album Without Regret. Will she succeed in this fast-paced market with little to no attention span? Probably not. But her latest single “Desperate Girls & Stupid Boys” is still pretty damn catchy.
And how about motherfucking Taylor Hicks? Remember that guy? Thanks to his obsessive “Soul Patrol”, he actually won the fifth season. His inauguration single “Do I Make You Proud” (aka the worst song ever written) hit number one on the Billboard charts! People magazine named him the “Hottest Bachelor” of 2006! For a brief moment, he was on top of the world…
Then it all fell apart. Taylor Hicks became the butt joke of American Idol, a threat to the show’s credibility. Yet despite all of this, I still think of him from time to time. Um, in a sexual context. I’ve been too embarrassed to mention this in the past, but today I realized this is what the Secret Sex series is all about.
So with a great amount of shame, I will finally admit it… I want to run my fingers through Taylor’s premature gray hair and make sweet love to him, like the poor man’s George Clooney he is. Does this make me proud? Not at all, my friend.
– Dewitt
To check out some shirtless pics of Taylor Hicks, follow the JUMP:
His last single, “Seven Mile Breakdown”:
yum he always gave me a tent his personality overlooks his looks like i mean sure hes a lil on the chubby side but who isnt? im sick of all these model hairless twinks out there give me a lil hicks before you give me some skinny ho named aaron but with that said im still obessed with Alex Marte his butt is amazing! he still needs an everything butt post
“Poor Man’s George Clooney”? More like “Jay Leno’s Retarded Inbred Cousin”!
“Poor Man’s George Clooney”? More like “Jay Leno’s Retarded Inbred Cousin”!
That style of “Southern Rock” died with The Allman brothers, and it ain’t comin’ back any time soon. Poor Taylor…stuck in the 70’s.
I totally agree! Why is he such a shameful pleasure!?
The sound would be good in the country market.
will always blow my mind that he beat out my boytoy chris daughtry…….soooo fuckin sexy
will always blow my mind that he beat out my boytoy chris daughtry…….soooo fuckin sexy
I have no specific reason but I totally hated him. I am so glad his “career” never took off. Then I would probably have to see his face more often. As for the secret sex, if he and I were trapped on a desert island together…I would be fucking coconuts before I would ever touch Taylor Hicks.
I don’t remember his music, but I agree he’s handsome. I wouldn’t kick him outta bed.
I don’t remember his music, but I agree he’s handsome. I wouldn’t kick him outta bed.
the first picture seems weirdly airbrushed.
You folks are not very well informed about hicks. Lets starts with Do I make you proud. Typical AI corination song but far from the worst one and he did as much as he could with it. The man has a good voice but if you have not been to one of his live shows you have no idea what kind of a performer he is. Kick ass band and great live music. He became the butt of AI jokes for one reason, thats what AI wanted. They started the jokes and the sheep media picked up on it. Seemed like fun. They did that because Hicks used them and then didn’t jump when they said to. But hes very busy and doing fine, just got back from performing with Robert Randolph , Mateo, Big Sams Funky Nation, and a whole bunch of other great jambands. Taylor played with these people before he was on AI and hes welcome with them.
Oh yeah, and he is sexy as all hell too.
Absolutely right!!
umm and how would you know this? what are you his personal voice trainer? psh i doubt it. guys a hack and should stop singing
umm and how would you know this? what are you his personal voice trainer? psh i doubt it. guys a hack and should stop singing
A top notch entertainer! Puts on an A+ stage show with a killer back up band. Got a great style. Love the guy on CDs…don’t think I want to go to bed with him.