All good things must come to an end. Robbie Williams may have been able to top us our Weekly Top Ten for one week, but he didn’t stand a chance against the powerhouse of gay fandom known as Britney Spears. He especially didn’t stand a chance against a song that celebrates getting spit-roasted by two hard dicks.

The bad news (or good news, depending on how you look at it) doesn’t stop there. This week, we’re waving goodbye to Janet Jackson, Beyonce, 3OH!3, Katy Perry and the Sugababes. Jennifer Lopez and The Gossip were eliminated before they even had a chance.

If you’re new to the Weekly Top Ten, you’ll need to go through an intense initiation process to hear the rules. It involves spanking and slings, though I guess I could just whisper them in your ear right now. Each week you’ll be presented with ten songs. You get to vote for up to three moving to the next week. From those results, we’ll take the five tunes with the highest percentages, a song we saved and four other contributions. These selections will make up the following week’s charts.

Don’t see your favorite song on the list? Leave a comment suggesting it for next week. We listen to nearly every song you recommend, and if it gives us visions of sweaty naked go-go boys… you might see it here next week!

– Dewitt

To check out the charts and vote, follow the JUMP:

1. Britney Spears – 3 (LW – 7): Well, this is a surprise. And for those of you who can’t sense when I’m being sarcastic, you should probably know that I’m being sarcastic. Now that it’s topped our charts, do you think Brit has a chance of rocking Billboard with her third number one US hit?
2. Whitney Houston – Million Dollar Bill (LW – 6): Phew! We were worried that you were gonna send this song to the heartbreak hotel. Thanks for rescuing it from the brink of extinction. Maybe we’ll do our own booty-pop video in your honor.
3. Lady Gaga – Paparazzi (LW – 5): I hate hating this song for performing so well on our charts. Even back in my Gaga skeptic days, this was one of the few songs I found tolerable. Why must you taint it so? Speaking of taints, I would really like to be licking one right now.
4. Miley Cyrus – Party in the U.S.A. (LW – 4): She’s just being Miley, and that means she’s just holding on to her number four spot. Has anyone ever asked this Disney tart what her favorite Jay-Z song is? Because I’m really curious.
5. Robbie Williams – Bodies (LW – 1): This man gets naked for you, and you let him fall four spots? Unacceptable. We’re rooting hard for Robbie, particularly because he was the first male vocalist to top our charts. Also, he gives us boners.
6. Shakira – She Wolf (LW – 3): Before you start freaking out that we saved Shakira over Janet, remember that this isn’t Ms. Jackson’s last chance. She’ll be back. Unfortunately, this could be Shakira’s last chance. If she doesn’t kick it up a notch, she’ll be gone from the charts forever.
7. Lady Gaga – Bad Romance (DEBUT): As we write this post, the final version of “Bad Romance” hasn’t even reared its head. Why are we convinced that this handicap will have absolutely no effect on this tune’s chart performance? Y’all are so far up Lady Gaga’s taint, that it’s ridiculous.
8. Carrie Underwood – Cowboy Casanova (DEBUT): I’ve already shared my feelings on this one, but a lot of you seem to really love it. I wouldn’t mind Carrie sticking around here for a while. I love my fair share of twang, just as much as I love to bang.
9. Jay Sean f/ Lil Wayne – Down (WILD CARD): This one’s number one in the country, but can it become number one on our charts? Given how well your previous wild cards have performed, I’m hesitant to say that it’ll even make it to the top five.
10. Kim Zolciak – Tardy For The Party (WILD CARD): Wow, we totally didn’t think you guys would be so into this one. To be quite honest, its inclusion in the wild card round was kind of a joke. That doesn’t change the fact that we still secretly love it.