Since taking the number one spot, Robbie Williams has thrust himself in and out of the glorious top position. This has not only allowed me to write posts with tons of innuendo, but it's also proven that the British hottie has excellent stamina and staying power. But what will happen when his other single is thrown into the mix? Are you prepared to be double-teamed by this atrociously attractive man?
Before you get too excited by that prospect, I have to deliver a bit of bad news. Four songs didn't survive the voyage to this week, including some big names. You'll have to say goodbye to Shakira, Adam Lambert, Rihanna and Dragonette. Thankfully, you'll be able to say "hello again" to two of them.
If you're new to the Weekly Top Ten, you'll have to pass a test before we tell you the rules. It involves doing a head-stand while simultaneously being pleasured orally, but I guess we could just skip that part and get right to the guidelines. Each week you'll be presented with ten songs. You get to vote for up to three moving to the next week. From those results, we'll take the five tunes with the highest percentages, a song we saved and four other contributions. These selections will make up the following week's charts.
So how do you get your favorite song on the list? Well, I don't want to scare you away, but it might involve handcuffs. Or you could just suggest it in the comments We listen to nearly every song you recommend, and if it makes us jizz our drawers… you might see it here next week!
– Dewitt
To check out the charts and vote, follow the JUMP:
- Robbie Williams – Bodies (LW – 2): When I initially heard "Bodies", you may remember that I wasn't too enthusiastic. In the time it's taken for his album to be released, I've somehow become a Robbie addict. He definitely deserves to be on top of me the charts.
- Florence + The Machine – You've Got The Love (LW – 3): How awesome would it be if Florence Welch stole the number one spot? I say this with no disrespect towards Robbie Williams or Lady Gaga, but that'd just be an incredible underdog story. Damnit, she's so talented!
- Lady Gaga – Bad Romance (LW – 1): After the premiere of the "Bad Romance" video, it'll be a crime if this song doesn't make it back to the number one spot. Even though I've said other folks may deserve to be there, Gaga deserves it even more. I mean, how many former skeptics were converted when they saw that video? I know too many to count!
- Lady Gaga – Alejandro (LW – 7): Just in case you've forgotten, there's a rule on these charts which dictates that one artist can only have two songs on the charts at any given time. This doesn't apply to songs in which they're a featured guest. Keep this in mind, because… well, you know.
- Ellie Goulding – Under The Sheets (LW – 8): Ellie managed to tie with Shakira and Aqua, so I guess I'm a bit biased in giving her the number five spot and eliminating "She Wolf". It's about time for some new songs to shine, eh?
- Aqua – My Mamma Said (LW – 9): Given the tie, I'm not going to count this as a save. The more I listen to this song, the more I wish it had been a solo song by Lene. I've said it too many times already, but the deep-voiced dude is just so fucking annoying.
- Shakira – Did It Again (DEBUT): It doesn't matter if you loathe this song, but can we please agree that this video is pure sex? The bed-dancing was too hot to handle, and I seriously almost came seventeen times.
- Robbie Williams – You Know Me (DEBUT): I'm glad I wasn't the only one who noticed Robbie using a phallic carrot as a microphone in this video. I nearly 'gasmed when he started to lower it into his mouth. It wasn't quite as sexy when he bit it, but at least I still had this song to keep the 'gasms cumming.
- Rihanna f/ Young Jeezy – Hard (DEBUT): You guys weren't too pleased with either of Rihanna's new singles, but I'll be standing by my girl on this one. I'm loving the new darker style. Oh, and just wait until you hear "Rude Boy", because it'll make you want to take your clothes off. Not that I've heard it or anything…
- Cheryl Cole – Fight For This Love (DEBUT): Lots of mixed reactions on this one. Some have said that this song only did so well in the UK because of heavy promotion on The X-Factor. Hmm, that would certainly explain why Paula Adbul's "I'm Just Here For The Music" was such a big hit.
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