We skipped a week. The three people reading this feature probably missed it. There’s just no sense in running all of these polls if we don’t tell you who won all of them, right? The completist in you needs to know! Plus, we really wanted to run the above pic of two wrestlers stuck in an accidental rimming situation. Wrestlin’ = hot.
– J. Harvey
To find out who won last week’s polls, Follow the JUMP:
Would You Hit That?: Charlie Day
We asked you guys if you were up for sticking it into comedian and It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia star Charlie Day. His spandexed bulge must have been especially transfixing because 67.61% of you felt that “He’s TOTALLY hot – yes!”. Another interesting outcome – 13.52% of you would fuck every guy in the cast except DeVito. Trollops.
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iPhone Wars: Battle Of The Happy Trails
Everyone loves a happy trail. It’s an excellent guide to follow to where all of your fourplay is going to end up. You know when you’re at the beach, and some hotass runs by dripping wet and he’s got an adorable happy trail? Yeah, boner beach. In last week’s “iPhone Wars”, 68.61% of you thought Contestant A had the sexiest treasure trail. There’s booty at the end. Well, in back. There’s cock at the end in front. Anatomy lesson for ya’ll.
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Fuck Vs. Fuck: The Boys Of Southern Strokes
There’s some hole for your Monday afternoon! My whimsical yet grounded co-blogger Dewitt’s painstakingly created “Fuck Vs. Fuck” feature gives you a smorgasbord of cock, butt, fucking, and sucking pics. And you have to choose which of the two scenes (and four performers) depicted is hotter. We ask a lot of you. These are hard choices to make. Versatile performers Logan Taylor (80.64%) and Carson Carver (58.3%) spanked (probably literally) Austin Perry and Colt McGraw.
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Aural Fixation: Openly Gay Artists
I’m fucking glad Dewitt brought back the music posts. Why? Cuz’ my ass has no time to be perusing music blogs to find out what the current songs are that I need to steal I mean download. Cazwell gets a lot of eye-rolls around here, but I’m fine with the openly gay sex rapper and his videos stuffed full of muscleboys. You guys are too, because his new collaboration with the raunchy Peaches (“Unzip Me”) won last week’s “Aural Fixation” with 28.92% of the vote! Seriously, Dewitt finds what’s good – give a little love to “Aural Fixation”.
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Who Would You Rather: Dancing With The Stars’ Remaining Men
This was SUCH a close race! Derek Hough and Maksim Chmerkovskiy were cock and cock, but the blonde ballroom dancing sensation beat him (36.07% to Maksim’s 33.13%). Derek beat him despite one commentator remarking that Derek has a “total ass face.” Sucks for Derek.
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That’s more than they did in their damn having sex episode! “Top Or Bottom” seems to be a much more popular feature since we stopped featuring Manhunt members and started asking about celebrities. Personally, I find that Glee’s Chris Colfer comes off as a total bottom and so did you. 66.39% of you felt that Kurt Hummel was a bottom.
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Unlockables: The Slutty Blowjob Shot
Personally, I find that slutty blowjob shot to be a lovely addition to anyone’s Manhunt profile pics. You do, too. 47.31% of you think that the shot is “Hot. They definitely turn me on”.
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And for those of you still reading, remember to vote for us in the Cybersocket Awards! Oh, and if you are traveling abroad and need to request some dick, this should come in handy.
Am I seriously one of the 3 ppl? hahaha